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+--- Thread: [Hot] Women who want to be single 2026 (/Thread-Hot-Women-who-want-to-be-single-2026)
[Hot] Women who want to be single 2026 - michaelhurst - 08-16-2026
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Article:
Results of 5 Studies | Psychology Today
“Do you want to be single?” is a surprisingly complicated question. How Many Americans Want to Be Single? Results of 5 Studies.
Click here for women who want to be single
“Do you want to be single?” is a surprisingly complicated question. THE BASICS. Why Relationships Matter Find a therapist to strengthen relationships. “There are some things in life you can never be prepared for. One of them is your daughter getting married.” That’s my paraphrase of a TV ad in which a man sits in his car and contemplates his daughter’s wedding. You know what that man really would not be prepared for? A daughter who had no interest in ever getting married. In popular culture, single people are often depicted as desperately seeking coupledom, if they are not already coupled and contemplating marriage. Sadly, many scholarly writings seem to be built on the same assumption that just about all unmarried people want to be married. How accurate is that belief? One way to look at this is simply to count the number of people who are not married. According to statistics recently released in celebration of Unmarried and Single Americans Week, 110.6 million Americans are unmarried (divorced or widowed or never married). That’s 45.2 percent of all adults 18 and older. It is a record high. But that doesn’t tell us how many of the 110.6 million unmarried Americans want to be single, and how many wish they were married. That should be an easy question to answer. I’m going to argue that it isn’t. I’ll suggest, using findings from five studies, that the data can be used to support the case that just about everyone wants to get married—or the opposite case, that people just aren’t all that interested in marrying anymore. Then I’ll argue that, in our current matrimaniacal culture, it is almost impossible to get an accurate answer to the question of how many people want to be single. But cultural revolutions do happen. One, in particular, may provide a template for how attitudes toward single people and single life might change. How many unmarried Americans want to be married? It depends on who you ask and how you ask. I’ve studied results from five national surveys. (Details are at the end of this article.) Typically, participants are asked some version of “Do you want to marry?” The highest percentage of people saying yes to that question that I’ve found, for any of the subgroups of unmarried Americans for any of the four surveys, was 64 percent, that was for people who were cohabiting with a romantic partner. Americans are much less likely to say they want to marry if they tried it before. Just over one-fifth of previously married adults say they want to marry, compared to over half of never-married adults. Men are more likely than women to say they want to remarry. Among unmarried women (never married and previously married), mothers are more interested in marrying than women who have no children. THE BASICS. Why Relationships Matter Find a therapist to strengthen relationships. If the only answers participants are allowed to give are yes (“I want to marry”), no (“I don’t want to marry”), or “I’m not sure,” close to one-third will say they aren’t sure. Give people more alternatives (“I don’t think I want to be married, but I’m open to my feelings changing” or “I don’t feel the need to be legally married, but I have or would like to have a committed/long-term partner”), and far fewer will choose the noncommittal “not sure.” What do these numbers really mean? Do most people still want to get married or not? An article in the Deseret News described the remarkable increase in the number of unmarried Americans over the past half-century, then added: “What hasn’t changed dramatically, though, is that most adults who have never been married still aspire to it.” Relationships Essential Reads. Making the case that just about everyone still wants to get married. Suppose you want to make the strongest case possible that lots of people still want to get married. You could focus on never-married adults: between 53 and 58 percent of them say they want to marry. Or zero in on those who are cohabiting—then you can get up to 64 percent. That big category of people who say they are not sure whether they want to marry offers lots of room to make whatever case you want to make. If you want to say that just about everyone wants to marry, then continue to focus only on those people who have never been married, and include those who say they are not sure they want to marry in with those who say they do want to marry. Now you have between 85 and 87 percent of people saying they want to marry or they are not sure. It is possible to make the case for marital aspirations even more powerfully. Continue to stick with just those people who have never been married. Set a very narrow criterion for who counts as not interested in marriage—only those people who choose the answer, “I don’t want to marry.” Don’t include anyone who says they are not sure. Now the number of people who do not want to marry (among those who have never been married) is only between 12 and 14 percent. Want to get that number even lower? Look at the study of unmarried women who are or are not mothers (study #5, below). Focus on the unmarried mothers. Look only at those who choose the answer, “I don’t want to be married.” Do not include anyone who says they are unsure, or who hedges by saying they don’t want to be married now, but may want to in the future. Also, exclude anyone who wants a committed partner but doesn’t care about marriage. The share of unmarried mothers who say, “I don’t want to be married,” is just 10 percent. Making the case that people just aren’t all that interested in marrying anymore. Suppose you want to make the opposite case, that people just aren’t all that interested in marrying anymore. I’ve got the group for you! Focus on the people who already tried marriage—people who are divorced and widowed. Look only at those who say, “I want to remarry.” Don’t include anyone who hedges by saying they are not sure. Now you’ve got a totally underwhelming share: somewhere between 21 percent and 23 percent of people who were previously married say they want to remarry . (See studies 2, 3, and 4, below.) Maybe we shouldn’t be so focused on marriage. Some people want a committed romantic relationship, but they don’t care about making it official by marrying. What if we look at all unmarried Americans, and ask them these questions: Are you in a committed romantic relationship? If not, are you currently looking for a romantic partner? A study that took that approach (#1, below) found that 26 percent of unmarried Americans said they were already in a committed romantic relationship. Another 16 percent said they weren’t but wanted to be. Those are the two groups that dominate popular culture and many scholarly writings about single people, yet they were the two smallest groups. The biggest group by far, 55 percent, said they were not in a committed romantic relationship and they weren’t looking for one. That’s for all adults, 18 and older. But even if you look only at the youngest adults, ages 18 to 29, that number drops only a few percentage points: 51 percent of them are not in a committed romantic relationship and not looking for one. Let’s go back to those 16 percent who get all the attention in movies, TV shows, and magazines—the single people who are not in a romantic relationship but say they want to be. In the study of real single people, they said they were looking for a partner, but they weren’t acting all that desperate. Thirty-six percent said they had not been on any dates at all in the past three months. Another 13 percent had only been on one date. So of the paltry 16 percent of unmarried Americans who say they are not partnered but they are looking for a partner, about half of them had either no dates or just one date in the past three months. The key question no one asks: “Do you want to be single?” I started researching this article because I wanted to know the answer to the question, “How many Americans want to be single?” I’ve wanted to know that for a long time, so I’ve been collecting relevant studies for years.
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